Before You Remarry-
Revisit Your Estate Plan and Other Considerations!
Remarriage is a cause for celebration, but it is important
to be practical and be knowledgeable about all of the matters that may be changed. In NC, as in many states, persons gain
automatic benefits (as to real estate, an elective share of an estate, retirement benefits, etc.). This can impact (positively
or negatively) many other people involved, especially the children or beneficiaries of the wife or husband. This also complicates
matters from an estate planning perspective, and in particular when there are elder care law and/or tax law issues involved.
Blending two families is also a breeding ground for family disputes unless proactive measures (clear communications, family
mediation, planning for contingencies) are used. You may be exposed to more debt or more assets. There are steps that you
can take to make the new marriage not only successful from an emotional perspective, but from a practical perspective as well.
Before you remarry, consider:
►Communicate with Family
Members:
There is nothing that
causes more problems than the failure to communicate. Why not have a trained and experienced mediator help you identify and
communicate with your family members? Why not have everyone on the same page from the beginning? 95+% of all disputes are
arguably the result of poor communications, so why not eliminate the 95% risk? At N & H we help you consider these options
and when appropriate, provide these services.
►Take an Inventory of Assets and Debts: This includes all assets/debts including
real estate, personal property, investments, life insurance, retirement benefits, family business assets, credit cards, and
all financial matters. Create a joint balance sheet, with a proposed income statement and do a cash flow analysis. Consider
contingency planning, especially for those matters that are more important as you get older.
►Establish a Financial Agreement: Establish a joint mission, a vision for your future, and the joint values that you have financially. If you have disagreement,
get it resolved before you remarry. Strategically plan out how you will deal with finances on a monthly and annual basis.
How will you evaluate what you are doing? What will happen if something changes as you need either a process or a specific
plan? This can be the result of the two of you working together or through a facilitated discussion such as mediation.
►Make Specific Decisions and Execute Proper Documents for When You Die: By remarrying you have now involved many more people
in the impact that your death may have. What about a pre-nuptial or post-nuptial agreement? What about trusts (especially
tax planning trusts such as the QTIP trust)? What about your new Will, your living wills, your financial and health care powers
of attorney? Does your remarriage impact the availability of government assistance for long-term health care matters? What
do you want to leave your heirs and how do you accomplish this? Do you need to change beneficiaries?
►Issues Regarding Family Businesses or Long-Term Family Property: Do you have a business or land that has been in your family
or that you wish to keep in your family? What are the options to help you accomplish these goals?
►Chronic Care Issues: Does
your family have a history of diseases such as type 2 diabetes, Parkinson’s, Alzheimer’s, etc.? Do you or your
prospective spouse have chronic problems now? What about children or other family members with special needs?
Every situation
and every family is different, and it is important to get professional help that not only understands what the elder care,
tax, family business, financial and estate planning matters involve, but how to help the proposed spouses and their families
communicate and be on the same page. So many people think that the practice of law includes just drafting documents, doing
very specific planning in one topic, or litigation. In fact, an effective lawyer needs to be very experienced and knowledgeable
about the subject matter of the issues involved in the remarriage, but also should be an effective facilitator of communications,
dispute prevention, and planning.